This file portion of www.watertownhistory.org website
What
Every Woman Should Know
Written and contributed by Ben Feld
Table of Contents
Chapter l For
Good Health
2 Social
Graces
3 Dress
4 The
Ideal Female Form
5 Thoughts
While Sewing
6 How
To
7 Take
My Advice
8 Cosmetics
9 Just
Good Advice
10 Take
My Advice One Last Time
11 For
Your Information
The magazines and newspapers carried
many articles of advice to women of all ages; articles purported to having been
written by women although some carry with them a tone which may lead the reader
to conclude it was actually written by a man.
In any event, we must remember that the editors invariably were men and
it was they who determined which articles would be printed in their publication.
Some of the advice was
timeless: “Don’t worry,” “Don’t lay awake at night thinking of your
shortcomings,” for instance. Other pieces of advice offered now seem hopelessly
out of date: “Drink milk and cream
whenever you happen to want them.“ “Do not take more exercise than is absolutely
necessary.”
The acceptance of the
following pages of advice
is left to the discretion
of the reader.
Chapter 1
FOR GOOD HEALTH
INTERESTING TO THE LADIES,
LOOKING GLASSES.
As the ladies are
proverbially fond of looking-glasses, they should be made acquainted with a fact,
but little-known or attended to, that the beauty and truth of their reflected
images very much depend upon the quality and color of the glass itself, which
are easily detected by merely holding white paper edgeways to the glass; and
just so much as the reflected paper varies in color from the paper applied, in
the same proportions are their complexions apparently tinged or blackened by
it. Thus, many persons are continually
imagining they “look ill,” and, perhaps, from this circumstance, really become
so, from the habit of using a glass that thus unconsciously disfigures them.
1848
It is singular that people will lay in bed these lovely
mornings, and sleep away the best part of their lives. You can form no idea how lovely the morning
is, before the sun has made its appearance above the eastern hills -- how quiet
the streets are, how beautiful the birds sing, apparently with the only
intention of pleasing you: what an hour
for meditation! Did you ever try
it? Of all the hours that God has given
us in the day, none is so calculated to make a woman admire all around her --
admire herself -- admire her Maker -- as is this hour of “early morn.”
1852
From an article by Dr. Wm.
F. Coale, in a Boston Medical and
Surgical Journal:
HEALTH OF FEMALES
The fact that an English woman lives half a century
before she begins to wane while our females reach their prime mostly at little
over half that age, and that another lustrum finds them on the decline, ought
strongly to arrest our attention and induce us to examine whether we are right
in attributing all this difference to climate, and whether we might not find in
some error or habits of early life, at least a partial explanation of the
disparity.
To be brief, then, after this preface -- to state broadly
our convictions -- we think that it is a radical error to making a difference
between the physical training of a man-child before nature has made a
difference in their physical being. So
long as there are muscles to develop:
the same organs of digestion and assimilation and to be stimulated the
same apparatus of respiration to be strengthened so long should the means of
doing this be the same in each sex. A
system of physical training so planned, should, we also hold, only be varied as
functions come into play, which in the future development of the being, may
require special care, and then we allow that to this training maybe modified --
but then only so far and at such times as the demand of the last may be
paramount -- no longer and no further.
We cannot but believe that were the physical female under 12 years of
age looked upon in these lights which we have placed her, and that were the
course we have sketched out pursued in bringing her foreword to the uses of
womanhood those used would be more properly performed, and with far less wear
and pay or to the general system, then that which is the daily pain of almost
every physician to witness, and which indeed often makes her a wreck long
before she has served her ultimate physical use—the crowning office as a
mother.
We would go farther, and say that the same error is made
in her moral training alas – and with the close connection in view between,
this cannot be unimportant. Her moral
training should be such, that while it made her not less a woman, it should
enable her to rise above the hundreds of arbitrary conventionalists that now,
in every way fetter her – that would mould every thought and control every
judgment -- that under the names of ”propriety,” “refinement,” “custom,” “fashion”
exert an absolute tyranny over her from the cradle to the coffin. This tyranny is broken through only in a few
individual cases, and then by a rebellion which for want of the very moral
training that originally permitted the oppression is so outré in its aspect as
to expose her to the charge of unsexing handed to render her, if not repulsive,
at least to the object of ridicule and sarcasm.
In short, we wish that woman should be taught to know her proprium, and
to make herself fit to fill it, not as the antagonist in the slightest sense,
but as the complement of man, the other half of a beautiful unit. While the physical training we urge would
never enable her to sing bass, the moral training would never fit her for the
rostrum, the pulpit, or the hustings; but, on the contrary, it would enable her
to see clearly her unfitness for these, and still further it would enable her
to see as clearly a hundred duties around her, which are peculiarly hers as a
woman, and the old and faithful performance of which would save her from that
harking care, that the discontent, most often unrecognized by herself, that
listlessness that now saps the moral, handed necessarily the physical vitality
of hundreds of her sex – that wears them down in mind and body – that brings
them sick headaches, crooked spines, flat chests, hysterias, premature age.
1853
RECEIPT FOR GOOD HEALTH AND
LOOKS
For a clear complexion:
Rise early
Use plenty of fresh water
Observe the strictest moderation in diet
Take plenty of exercise in the open air
To give brilliancy to the
eyes:
Shut them early at night
Open them early in the morning
Let the mind be constantly intent on the exercise of
benevolent feelings
To preserve the forehead
from wrinkles:
Cultivate contentment, calmness and a benign spirit
Never indulge a murmuring and resentful, or a malevolent
feeling
By constant adherence to
the above simple rules, many females have preserved their attractions even to
the age of fourscore years and upwards.
1855
To be sprightly, live
rightly, eat lightly, rest nightly, very quietly and long.
1884
ADVICE TO YOUNG LADIES
Don’t worry
Don’t lay awake at night to
think about your shortcomings
and other people’s sins
Don’t care violently for anyone
Hearts and consciences are
opposed to rounded contours and shapely necks
Eat meats with fat on them,
Eat fish with white sauce
Eat potatoes, cornstarch,
simple pudding, and ice creams
Wear warm, luxurious
clothing, but be careful not to have it
so warm as to induce
perspiration, for that would prove thinning
Drink milk and cream
whenever you happen to want them
If you don’t care for these nourishing drinks, cultivate
a taste for them
Avoid lemonade, lime juice and the like
Drink not tea and coffee,
but cocoa, chocolate and milk
Spurn toast, especially if
it be made of graham or gluten bread
Eat freshly made wheat
bread, with butter and honey
Do not take more exercise
than is absolutely essential to health
Take the air -- yes --, But
let it be in a carriage, whenever you can,
or sitting on a sunny bench
in the park
Violent exercise is the
worst possible thing for the woman
who would fain grow plump.
1898
HEALTH and HAPPINESS
Don’t anticipate trouble.
Don’t gossip; have faith in
God, in humanity and in yourself.
Don’t imagine every dark
cloud you see is going to bring up a cyclone.
Fill every day brimful of
sunshine for some one else, and much
of it will be reflected on
you.
Make the best of what you
possess; enjoy it; be happy today;
don’t put it off until next
year.
Take a little rest now and
then; enjoy your friends; don’t scold;
keep your thoughts pure.
Take a sponge bath every
morning in cold water, and rub briskly
with a crash towel for ten
minutes; take moderate exercise
and plenty of fresh air.
Cleanliness, purity, fresh
air, faith and calm consideration are the
best of life-preservers.
WR
Long before Martha Stewart,
Miss Manners, or even Emily Post or Dorothy Dix appeared on the scene, guidance
in the social graces was being offered freely and abundantly. In the 1800’s, an eagerness to be socially
correct was no less apparent than it had been at the time of the Revolution. What were the ladies of note wearing? How did they deport themselves? What little mannerisms separated the ladies
of the local community from the well-bred, high-toned lady of what was looked
upon as “the elite”? Much help in that
field was available in the magazines and newspapers of the day.
Chapter 2
SOCIAL GRACES
Remember, ladies, that a lady with eyes that resemble
peeled onions, and a nose as crooked as a politician’s creed, a chin like a
hoe, and a mouth stretched from here to there and opening like a jack knife,
will be sooner respected and beloved by all whose opinion is worth having, if
she possesses a good heart and kind disposition, than if she were as beautiful
as Milton’s Eve, with a cork-screw disposition and a heart of lead.
1850
No trait of character is more valuable in a female than
the possession of a sweet temper. Home
can never be made happy without it. It
is like the flowers that spring up in our pathway, reviving and cheering
us. Let a man go home at night, wearied
and worn by the toils of the day and how soothing is a word dictated by a good
disposition! It is as sunshine falling on his heart. He is happy; the cares of life are forgotten. A sweet temper has a soothing influence over
the minds of the whole family. Where it
is found in the wife and mother, you observe kindness and love predominating
over the natural feeling of bad hearts.
Smiles. kind words. And looks characterize the children, and peace and
love have their dwelling there. Study,
then, to acquire a sweet temper.
The above will apply to male, or female, and contribute
much to the health and comfort of each.
1851
Girls, never ever allow a
lover to have his arm around you. The papers daily show that thousands of our
brightest young men are going to waist.
1884
A pleasant entertainment for a few friends is called a
“quotation party.” When the invitations are given the request accompanies them
so that the recipient will come to the party with three quotations memorized. When these quotations are given, the name of
the author is to be given by any one of the company who can do so. The one who first guesses or gives the name
receives a favor, usually a flower; if this is not practicable a bit of narrow,
bright ribbon, that can be tied in the button hole, is substituted.
1885
We have heard it quite frequently remarked that if the
young girls who are in the habit of flirting with the well-dressed strangers that
occasionally visit the city, would just stop and think to what extent they are
being criticized by spectators, and what questionable object these strangers
have in view concerning them, they would readily see the errors of their
actions and conduct themselves in a more lady-like manner. These young girls who ignore the attentions
of reputable resident young men, and amuse themselves by carrying on a
flirtation with strangers, cannot possibly be well thought of. Their intentions are perhaps innocent enough,
but these strangers do not consider that, but point them out and tell, in a
boastful way, what fun they had with this or that girl. and the young lady will
soon be looked upon with suspicion.
There are, of course, a large number of excellent strangers that come to
the city, but they do not form the acquaintance of young ladies by
flirtation. Girls, if you could only see
yourselves as others see you, and to know how your actions are being
criticized, you would soon abandon the desire of meeting the young travelers
who have no honorable object in view.
1889
Don’t You
Do It, Ladies
Don’t stand at the door of a streetcar and worry some man
near at
hand into giving you a seat
when there are three empty seats
at the head of the
car. You all do it.
Don’t sit down in a car
until space has been made for you.
Don’t get off a car with
your back to the horses. Men get a great
deal of
fun out of your persistency
in doing this. But you are not
bound to amuse men.
Don’t leave your handkerchief
and pocketbook in your lap when you
are riding in a
streetcar. Some man will pick them up
for you
as you are passing out, but
they will get muddy.
Don’t wait until you get in front of a ticket-office
window before taking
out your pocketbook. The wives of the eight men who
are patiently waiting the
opportunity to buy tickets are
wondering why they are so
late home.
Don’t have your skirt badly
fastened at the back so that your
underskirt becomes
visible. You can’t see this, and no
woman will ever tell you.
Don’t keep smoothing the
wrinkles out of your waist. A few
wrinkles
will keep you from looking
hideously smooth lake a fashion plate.
Don’t try to have a long
waist. For 3,000 years the artists --
the
professor and conservators
of beauty -- have been saying that
a short waist is more
beautiful. At last please take the hint.
Don’t forget that no one
who could possibly be considered an
authority ever said a small
waist was beautiful.
Don’t wear shoes that are
not at least three-quarters of an inch longer
than your feet. Pretty feet are better than small feet. And
besides, remember how
nervous and peevish you are.
Don’t get hot and cross
when your child whispers a little on the
ferryboat. Let him howl a little. Nobody will complain but
a few old maids and a stray
bachelor, and they
are not worth considering.
Don’t forget to be punctual
in keeping an appointment. You never
are,
but it is not too late to
reform.
Don’t ridicule dress reform
until you have found out what it is.
Don’t forget to keep to
your right in going up and down stairways.
You lose much time in
shopping because you overlook this necessity.
Don’t be led by a pug dog
unless you have no further interest in the
admiration of an honest
man.
Don’t be so dreadfully
cordial when you meet a woman you detest.
Don’t use the word
”gentleman” when “man” will do. Every
real
gentleman is willing to be
called a man.
Don’t leave the kissing
good-bye until the car has come to a full stop.
Don’t handle articles you
have no intention of buying.
Don’t use the precious
adjective “lovely” for every and any occasion.
Don’t make your husband a
selfish brute by eternally waiting on him.
Don’t give yourself a
questionable position in the world by living in
idleness on your husband’s
labors. No intelligent woman
is willing to be
“supported.”
Don’t wait until you get to
the piano to pull off your gloves when
you are asked to play.
Don’t choose a time when
you have company to find fault with
your husband. If you do, he will get even with you if it
takes all winter.
If you wear a trailing
skirt in the street, don’t claim that it is because
you rather like it. Admit candidly that you haven’t the
pluck to defy an absurd
fashion.
1891
Watertown has a phenomenon in the shape of a young lady
who does not like candy or chew gum. She
is a pretty girl, too, and the fact that she does not chew gum places her one
among a thousand. Then there is the
modest girl who does not like to have a newspaper reporter look at her, as she
picks her way across a muddy crossing; and the girl who thinks it is all right
for him to look at her if he wishes. It
is an indisputable fact that Watertown has a large number of remarkably pretty
girls, and they are smart, able to teach school, keep house, make a good
appearance on the street and many of them will be owners of rich farms, and
excellent chances for young men who have no farms.
1892
The fashionable accent is another important matter to be
considered by the maid who desires to seem one of the society elect. She must avoid a lisp unless she wishes to
band herself a half-century behind the times.
The broad “a” of the Anglomaniac has also seen its best days. The Southern drawl, with its apparent indifference
to the existence of the average final syllable, is threadbare. To be up-to-date from a vocal point of view
it is necessary to cultivate a soft, low voice, and enunciation so distinct
that occasionally you convey that the capital letter is at the end of the word,
and a certain vivacity of utterance that throughout Europe is associated with
the modern American girls.
1898
THE CINDERELLA GONGS
The Philadelphia matron is responsible for a new fad,
says the Philadelphia Inquirer. This is the Cinderella gong. All persons who are calling at the house are
supposed to say “Good night” when the Cinderella rings.
If a hostess is giving a party the gong is not rung until
Many a maiden has put a very pretty gong at the side of
her fireplace in the drawing-room or sitting-room, and when the clock points to
10:30 p.m. she playful steps there and rings it.
This Cinderella gong is very new, but it had its
counterpart several years ago. The
charming mother of a popular young woman arranged a little clock in a wide
velvet stand. On the white velvet the black lettering showed out strong in its
paraphrasing of the well-known lines from “The Mikado”:
“From one little maid take
the boys away, At
If a caller didn’t notice
the lettering when he first came in he would be pretty sure to do so when the
alarm went off at
1899
The official kiss is not exclusively a masculine
prerogative. There are times when court
etiquette demand that women, too, shall kiss.
On the occasion of the Crown Prince of Greece’s wedding, the bride,
Princess Sophia of Russia, the Kaiser’s sister, was obliged to bestow no fewer
than 150 kisses. The King of Greece
received three kisses, so did his Queen, so did the Empress Fredrick and the
King and Queen of Denmark and Kaiser William and the Empress, while all the
princes and princesses present received one kiss apiece.
1899
WOMEN WORKERS ARE MORAL
Carroll D. Wright, the eminent
statistician, has been looking into condition of the workingwomen of the country,
and arrives at the conclusion that work and immorality are widely
disassociated. In a recent paper, quotes
the Chicago Chronicle on the subject he says:
“The popular impression is that women
wage-workers are not up to the standards prevalent under the old hand system of
labor and woman’s entrance into the industrial field has lowered her moral
standard, and the statements constantly made that low wages naturally compel
women to supplement their earnings by an immoral life. Those who know the circumstances best are
convinced that this view is absolutely false and that the working-women of this
or any other civilized country are upon as high a plane of purity as any class
in the community.
“It should be borne in mind that
regular employment is conducive to regular living, and that regular employment
does not as a rule harmonize with a life of immorality and intemperance or even
crime. An official investigation into
the character, surroundings and conditions of working women in 22 of the large
cities of the United States, comprehending information relating to 3866 fallen
women, showed that a large proportion of them (1,555) came from housework and
hotel work, the next largest (505) were from the ranks of seamstresses,
dressmakers and employees of cloak and shirt factories, while 1,236, or 31.97
per cent of the entire number, came directly from their homes.”
1899
Chapter 3
DRESS
The thirst for information
about the comings and goings of the setters of fashions in far away places had
its negative side. Men and women
together joined in the complaint that what was considered fashionable the
summer of one year was declared hopelessly out of date the next although still
in perfect condition.
In that respect, things
have definitely not improved
The “Skirt Expander” is the
title of an article of female apparel, which is so constructed that the wearer
can enlarge or diminish herself at pleasure.
All the lady has to do is blow herself up, and she is ready to see
friends or take a promenade, join in a waltz or appear at church. By this invention it appears bustles have
vanished into thin air.
1847
The eccentric dress-reformer, Dr. Mary Swalker, has just
obtained a clerk-ship in the pension bureau.
A former secretary of the treasury once refused to give her a place in
his department unless she resumed woman’s attire. Pantaloons were dearer to her
than wealth, power and treasury position, and she promptly declined it on any
such condition. The commissioner of
pensions has required no change in the cut of Dr. Mary’s garments. She has been admitted, pantaloons and
all. Perhaps other women who are seeking
positions in the Washington departments might have better success if they
should put on trousers.
1882
Square court trains are revived
Fur-bordered turbans are very popular.
The jersey corset cover
bids fair to replace those of cotton or linen.
Mouzaras tissue, an Indian
fabric, is one of the season’s novelties.
Cream lace is used with it.
Cheap kid gloves are a
delusion and a snare, which the economical
woman will do well to shun.
Velvet exotics, superbly
shaded, are the favorite garnitures for Parisian
visiting and reception
bonnets.
Gloves of pale golden
brown, ecru and tan are still worn with costumes
of every description and
color. `
Gloves of white undressed
kids reaching above the elbow are the costly
favorites for evening wear
in Paris, at present. They are, it is
needless to say, of cream
white and not the ghastly chalk white
The ultra fashionable girl
writes her letters in jet black ink, on paper
imitating exactly a fine
hemstitched handkerchief; puts the sheet
into a large square
envelope, with a hemstitched border, and
seals it with her own
monogram in black wax
1885
A ball dress of white satin, with stripes of
salmon-covered velvet, is a triumph of the modiste’s art. The peasant waist is plain and pointed.
Around the neck and shoulders there is a puffing of white satin, covered with a
drapery of salmon tulle, dotted with minute tassels of pink pearls. The robe is trained and the front of the
skirt is exquisitely draped with the beautiful pearl-covered salmon tulle.
1885
Many slender ladies follow the fashions set by Sarah
Bernhardt, and have their gloves reach nearly to the shoulders, pushing them
down to the elbow and allowing the extra fullness to wrinkle over the arm. By some this is considered the height of
fashion. There are many other, however,
who dislike the fashion as heatedly as when it was first introduced.
1887
Two distinct sorts of dresses were worn at the great
Centennial ball. One consisted of new
designs, either direct from Paris, or wrought out by New York makers fresh from
Parisian models. The other was a revival
in fabric, if not in shape of the fashion of a hundred years ago. A first-rate illustration of the former class
was the toilet of Mrs. William Waldorf Astor.
This lady’s mother-in-law, Mrs. William Astor, arrived from Paris within
a week of the ball and brought brand new gowns for herself and several other
ladies. The one worn by the younger Mrs.
Astor had been so accurately constructed and carefully fitted to a mechanical
form of the customer kept in the establishment of Worth for such purposes that
not the slightest alteration was required after its arrival. The materials were white satin and lace. There was a richness of fabric and a
conformity to such outlines Worth had prescribed for the spring and ensuing
summer in evening dress. The only
novelty about it is the shape of the sleeve, which reaches not quite to the
elbow and is composed altogether of loose lace.
The dress which Mrs. William Astor brought for her own wearing had a
full train and was composed of white satin, hand-embroidered with silver
filigree and covered with beautiful flowers, leaves and vines in delicate
shades. The sleeves were short, and the
bodice, of the same material, was cut low.
The petticoat, also of white satin, was richly embroidered. Mrs. Astor wore all her diamonds -- some
$250,000 worth, it is said. They
included a stomacher of 12 rows of glittering gems, and triple necklace and
tiara of diamond stars. Another of Mrs.
Astor’s personal importation was worn by Mrs. Coleman-Drayton. It was of heavy white satin, with silver and
pearl embroider. The corsage was cut
remarkably low to permit the wearing of Mrs. Drayton’s sapphires. The entire front of the corsage was covered
with sapphires and pearls. She wore
similar gems at her throat and in her hair.
A granddaughter of the late William H. Vanderbilt, Mrs.
Louise Shepard, had an heirloom piece of brocade satin cut up into revers of
her bodice and a lengthwise section of her skirt, the rest of the dress being
made of blue satin. Her hair hung down
in a braided form. That is a new thing
for young girls.
1889
A popular model for autumn costumes used by modistes has
a princess coat and skirt of serge, homespun, tweed or camel’s hair, with a
silk blouse for the house, fitted over a heavily-toned lining, but rather full
and seamless of itself, excepting the seams under the arms. The bell skirt is, for instance, of ecru,
moss green, or pale brown cheviot, with ruche of green velvet at its hem. The blouse is of pale brown silk with a
plaited ruche of silk going around the neck and down the front. The jacket is of cheviot like the skirt,
lined with silk like the blouse, and this jacket fits very snuggly in the back
and on the sides, and is frequently belted and finished with a flat Watteau
plait in the back. Odd-looking princess
coats on French models are cut out low in the neck, front and back, with an
inserted guimpe-like top of gathered velvet or heavy surah or brocade. The forearm of the sleeves matches this
guimpe in fabric and trimming.
1892
Earrings are no longer
fashionable, and the best dressed women appear now at the opera without even
the solitaire pearl or turquoise screw which was the gradual abandonment of the
ornamental earbobs.
1892
Perfumed garters are among the luxurious accessories by
which the aesthetic girl shows she is more daintily clad than most folks. Possibly she has several pairs, being careful
to wear yellow ones with black hosiery and black ones with tan. These garters are made from watered ribbon
about an inch and a half wide and solid silver buckles if just the garter is
worn alone, or both buckles and garter clasps if a supporter is preferred. The ribbon is doubled over a layer of cotton
with sachet powder, and the wearer if very fastidious, may have her name
engraved on the silver buckle, so if she should lose it there may be some
chance of its return. Bridal garters must be made of white frilled elastic with
silver or even jeweled buckles and knots of real lace.
1894
Mrs. John A. Logan does not like bloomers and she has her
opinions concerning the new woman. “In
the first place,” said she in response to a query as to what she thought of the
new woman, “I think the appellation is offensive. If by the new woman is meant those, either
young or old, who have laid aside all restraints in indulging in the sport, and
I might say dissipations, supposed to be the prorogation of man, not the least
is cigarette smoking and kindred vices, I am sorry that her day has come. If on the other hand is meant the
intelligent, cultured, womanly woman, who has kept abreast of the times and has
taken advantage of the exceptionally fine opportunities affording American
woman of participating in everything that tends to broaden the field of her
usefulness and develop her intellectual powers, without doing violence to her
heart or lessening her love of home and family, I say all hail the new woman.
I passed through the park on the south side of Chicago
recently while a bicycle meet was at its height. I had never seen such a sight before in all
my life or had greater occasion to blush for the modesty of American girls. Some were dressed properly and becomingly,
while others appeared in garments they were pleased to call bicycle suits that
were simply disgusting to any man or woman.”
1895
Lawrence University
(Appleton) has abjured bloomers. No
formal meeting of the women students resulted from this announcement, but the
teacher of Delsarte who took up her work in the school this fall, made the
first suggestion of the doubtful value of athletic training for women and,
inasmuch as the suggestion involved a proposed change of costume from the one
which had prevailed before, it was welcomed by the girls of the school. Miss Graham says the live girl will get all
the training of an outdoor nature that she needs without bringing in a need for
muscular training, so she had introduced a system which trains a prospective
home girl. The new costume is one of a
flaring skirt and sailor neck blouse and has taken the fancy of the girls.
1898
The fashion for the fall and winter runs to bows, whereupon
the Chatterer of the Boston Herald remarks:
“Happy the girl with the long neck.
It takes a giraffe’s to carry off the new bowy structures. There is a resort of an arrangement to set
above an oval face, from a wisp of white tulle, tied tightly around, with a big
bow at the back -- and mind, this is like Beau Brummel’s neckties, used but
once -- and fur neckties! Yes, fur
frills and bows, if you please, and never mind the sore throats they may bring,
as long as those cozy sable tails are becoming.
I know several young doctors who will be charmed to hear about the fur
necklace.”
1898
My lady’s slipper sees a very radical change this
summer. It is no more plain and
unadorned; no longer does a simple little bow or unobtrusive rosette ornament
it. Instead, the slipper is a very
gorgeous affair. It glistens both by
sunlight and the gleam of gas or electricity, for it is a jeweled slipper, and,
oftener than otherwise, elaborately jeweled.
The style is to have these slipper jewels match the pin or necklace you
are wearing, both in the gems themselves and in the setting. When fantastic and curious designs are worn,
in oddly finished gold, the effect is exceedingly picturesque and effective. Rhinestones are to be favorite slipper ornaments
of the summer, diamonds used to twinkle perilously at one’s feet.
1898
The latest Parisian “dress” sensation is the “Divorce”
costume, which, as its name implies, is a combination of two sharply
contrasting colors, such as not many seasons ago were considered quite
impossible in a costume. The
combinations are decidedly bizarre but are credited with great success. A costume in such a combination suitable for
this intermediate season is of nut-brown and Hortense colored silk. “Devant” of nut brown silk is formed of two
deep flounces, the back of the skirt is of Hortense silk, as is also the jaunty
little jacket, which is arranged in the front in a Marie Antoinette fichu, the
opening in the neck filled in with a pinked ruffle of nut-brown silk. Another very striking costume has a redingote
of terra cotta armure, opening over a mastic bengaline underskirt; the waist,
belt and edge of the skirt are trimmed with rich black silk and jet embroidery. The foulard blouses in gay designs and
variety of make are greatly favored by young girls. They are both practical and becoming, and can
be worn with the simplest skirt.
1899
A review of the fashions reveals the fact that the older
a thing is the more fashionable it is likely to be. Most society women, whose knowledge of and
acquaintance with Dame Fashion is not of recent date, will tacitly agree with
this statement, and the younger members of fashionable society need only
rummage in the old forgotten trunk, stowed away in an out-of the-way corner,
and they will find dresses worn long ago which might, with a little furbishing
up, do duty as novel and unique Empire gowns.
The choicest pieces of grandmother’s store are the originals from which
are copied the handsome gowns which make up the fashionable girl’s
wardrobe. Gowns of all styles and of all
ages are worn. Even the plainest dress
with but few artistic touches can be made into a quaint and fashionable garment.
At a recent reception held by a prominent woman’s club some curious studies in
dress could have been made. Most of the slender women of literary pursuits wore
the classic Grecian raiment. Those on
pleasure bent were attired in the most approved and correct Empire costume, and
those who were there on business “pure and simple” wore strictly tailor-made
garments, yet the one woman who was dressed in soft black silk, with a frill of
creamy lace at her throat, seemed not out of place in this fanciful but earnest
gathering. Every style is allowable if
pretty and becoming, and a wide field is given woman in which to exercise her
own individuality. With taste and
ingenuity she can slightly modify for change any prevailing style, making it
becoming and peculiar to herself.
1899
Parasols are one of the
latest dictates to fashion.
The large woman never
chooses plaids for her spring costume.
The most stylish train may sometimes hide a pair of shoes
with crooked heels.
1899
Just a short walk through any
art museum will bring to realization that the concept of what measurements go
to make up the ideal feminine figure has changed enormously through the
centuries. What was once considered the
epitome of feminine beauty differs greatly from what is held to be the ideal
figure of today.
But who can say what are
the unarguable dimensions of a body?
Perhaps the only acceptable attitude, in that respect, was that of
Abraham Lincoln who, when queried about how long a person’s legs should be,
responded, “Long enough to reach from the body to the floor.”
Ultimately, most accept the
old proverb: “Beauty is in the eye of
the beholder”
Chapter 4
THE IDEAL FEMALE FORM
Headly, in his letters from Italy, has the following
paragraph on an interesting subject, which we extract for the benefit of our
fair readers as have not seen his work:
”In form, the Italians excel us. Larger and fuller, they naturally acquire a
finer gait and bearing. It is
astonishing that our ladies should persist in that ridiculous notion that a
small waist is, and per-necessity, must be beautiful. Why, many an Italian lady would cry in
vexation, if she possessed such a waist as some of our ladies acquire only by
the longest, painfullest process. I have
sought the reason for this difference, and can see no other only that the
Italians haves their glorious statuary continually before them as models, and
hence endeavor to assimilate to them; whereas our fashionables have no models,
except those French stuffed figures in windows of milliner shops. Why, if an artist should presume to make a
statue, with the shape that seems to be regarded with us as the perfection of
harmonious proportion, he would be laughed out of the city. It is a standing objection against the taste
of our women the world over, that they will practically assert that a French
milliner understands how they should be made, better than nature herself.”
1847
A London anatomist is authority for the statement that
the ideal foot should be the length of the ulna, a bone in the forearm, which
extends from a protuberance in the outer portion of the wrist to the
elbow. Of course, the ulna is longer in
tall people, and to be graceful the foot must be also.
Many people may be surprised that the foot should be as
long as the forearm, and might be inclined to dispute the fact unless proved by
demonstration. But so it is in the
perfectly formed woman.
1899
“I find great difficulty
getting a model with good arms,” said a well-known sculptor recently. “It is astonishing how few women there are
with arms that conform to the standard.
A perfect arm, measured from the wrist joint to the armpit, should be
twice the length of the head. The upper
part of the arm should be large, full, and well rounded. There should be a dimple at the elbow. The
forearm must not be too flat, not nearly so flat as a man’s, for instance.
“From a well-molded shoulder the whole arm should taper
in long, graceful curves to a well-rounded wrist. It is better to have an arm that harmonizes,
even if the parts do not conform to the generally accepted lines. For instance, a full, round upper arm which
is joined to a flat or thin forearm has a very bad effect. Perhaps it is only a little worse, however,
than a graceful, well-molded forearm tacked on to a thin, scrawny upper arm.
“Correctness of form is not the only thing necessary for
a good arm. The owner must possess the
power of expression with her arm.
American women are deficient in this as a rule. Those nationalities which show the most
expression in their arms are Spanish, French and Italian. The warmest admirers of Sara Bernhardt would
not claim that she had beautiful arms, yet no one can say that the divine Sara
ever appears ungainly in consequence.
Much more lies in the faculty of arm expression than is generally
supposed.”
1899
FOR A LOVELY VOICE
The Following Pastes and
Rules will Make One
Like anything else the voice can be trained and modeled
with a little care. One should never
scream, shriek or even raise the voice above its natural pitch, and when
singing should avoid straining the vocal chords, which, when once injured,
never regain their softness. Here again
I must caution my fair readers against the exaggerated use of tobacco,
alcoholic drinks, highly spiced food, etc., for their effect on the voice is
disastrous, says a famous opera singer.
Plenty of milk, buttermilk, raw eggs, lemonade and
occasionally a mouthful of hot water have a beneficial effect on the
voice. Chickweed tea cures hoarseness
and so does an infusion of plantain leaves and elder blossoms.
In the Orient a wonderful paste is prepared from the pulp
of the apricot and the fig, which marvelously softens and sweetens the
voice. The fruit is peeled and slowly
cooked with an equal quantity of sugar until reduced to thick syrup, when it is
poured into flat pine boxes and allowed to dry in the sun. A few pieces of this paste eaten two or three
times a day are said to cure all the small troubles of the throat and lungs --
cankers, colds, etc.
Another, and it is a very ancient remedy for the same
complaints, is to slice some raw carrots into a deep plate or dish and to
thickly cover them with fine granulated sugar.
Put the dish on ice for three hours, when you will find that all the
juice of the carrots has turned the sugars into delicious syrup, a spoonful of
which is to be taken at a time.
The Female Bust
I have been asked what the size of a grown female’s bust
should be. Some say the difference between the waist and underarms should be
ten inches. I think four or five inches
at the outside measure. The natural size
is what is wanted, not one distorted with corsets or squeezings.
In order to decide this question two women physicians
have been consulted on the subject. Mrs.
Mary Putnam Jacobi says:
“There is no fixed proportion between the size of the
bust and the size of the waist. Still
less can there be any fixed measurement for either waist or bust, seeing that
this must vary with the height of the individual and with other
circumstances. The most general rule
about the typical female figure is that the breadth of the shoulders should
correspond to the breadth of the hips, while in the man the shoulders are much
broader than the hips. The size of the
waist varies not only with the expansion of the lower part of the chest, but
also with the development of the muscles and the amount of fat upon them.
“The test of tight lacing is not the absolute size of the
waist, but the degree of compression of the soft parts needed in order to allow
the corset or dress to fasten. When
there is no compression the corset should fasten easily in the middle. But, naturally, the corset cannot be fastened
in the middle until the top has been fastened.
It is then always too tight.
“Undeveloped chests and waists are not always due to
compression of clothing, but to lack of systematic development by gymnastics
during the growing period -- that is, from ten to eighteen. It is precisely then that corsets are most
dangerous and precisely then mothers apply them to ‘form and figure.’ If not worn before twenty-five corsets may be
worn after with impunity.”
Dr. Mary E. Gage said that her attention has never been
called to the point in question, as the proportionate size of a woman measured
under her arms and around her waist has nothing to do with her health.
“But,” said she,” I should give as my opinion that ten
inches is nearer the proportionate difference than four or five.”
Then to prove that she was right, she kindly took the
trouble to measure four women on the spot.
In two instances there was a difference of eight inches between the
waist and bust measure. In the third
there was nine and in the fourth ten.
All the women were well proportioned.
Afterward the measure of a woman was taken who had never worn a corset
in her life, and the difference between the two points were barely six inches.
Dr. Gage brought up an argument in favor of her own
decision that the ready-made waist sold to a woman of ordinary size were shaped
in exact proportion to that she had named -- that is, ten inches difference
between bust measurement and the waist.
1889
Women are from Venus; men
are from some other place,
and there isn’t much either
sex can do about it..
Chapter 5
THOUGHTS WHILE SEWING
Men sew wild oats
And women sew buttons
The shortest way to a man’s
heart
is down his throat
Man’s love is like the moon
If it does not grow larger
it is certain to grow smaller
A man may do good by
stealth
But as for his blushing to
find it fame, that’s all nonsense
Man shrinks from cold meat
Does this arise from man’s innate desire of
always ruling the roost?
Man takes a woman and a
dowry in the same way that he accepts the
hamper that brings him a
handsome present of game
Men have two ways of
extinguishing the flame of love:
either they let it burn out quietly or they
snuff it out at one blow
In a dilemma, during the
time a man has been standing like a fool fumbling
for an excuse, a woman
would have invented ten thousand
Wives are often foolish to
sit up for their husbands, but you hear
of few husbands who have
the patience to sit up for their wives
How many men are there who
think they are making themselves exceedingly
popular -- when they are
making themselves extremely ridiculous.
1853
When a man’s conscience begins to get hard, it does it
faster than anything in nature;
it is, some may say, like
the boiling of an egg; it is very clear at first, but it
soon gets cloudy, one
minute more you may cut it with a knife.
1852
Woman’s Tenderness and Love
It has been said that in sickness, there is
no hand like a woman’s hand; no heart like a woman’s heart and there is
not. A man’s breast may swell with
unutterable sorrow, and apprehension may rend his mind yet place him by the
sick couch, and shadowy rather than light of sad night watches it; let him have
to count over the long dull hours of the
night and wait alone sleepless, the struggle of the gay dawn into the chamber
of suffering -- let him be appointed to his ministry, even for the sake of the
brother heart, or the father of his being, his grosser nature, even close, and
his spirit grow impatient of his dreamy task; and though love and anxiety
remain undisturbed, his mind will own to itself a creeping in of an
irresistible selfishness, which he may indeed be ashamed of and struggle or
reject, but which, in spite of all his effort characterize his nature and prove
in one instant at least, manly weakness.
But see a mother, a wife,
or a sister, in his place. The woman
feels no weariness, or forgetfulness. In
silence, in the depth of night, she dwells, not passively, but so far as the
qualified terms may express our meaning, joyously. Her ear acquires a bind man’s instinct, from
time to time it catches the slightest stir or whisper the breath of the now
more than loved one who lies under the hand of affliction. Her steps, as in obedience to an impulse of a
signal, would not awaken a mouse; if she speaks, her words, soft echo of
natural harmony most delicious to the sick man’s ear, convey all that sound can
convey of pity, comfort, and devotion; and thus night after night she tends
him, like a creature sent from a higher world when an earthly watchfulness has
failed; her eyes never twinkling; her nature, that at other times was weakness, now gaining
superhuman strength, and magnanimity, herself forgotten, her sex alone,
predominant.
1850
They tell about a man in
Maine who refused to get up and light the fire, and as his wife said she
wouldn’t, they remained in bed thirty-seven hours before this matter was
settled.
Our sympathies are, of
course, with the woman, and we may be permitted to entertain a regret that it
did not occur to her perform a great deed of self-sacrifice upon this
occasion. How noble and beautiful would
have been the example set her husband, how touchingly would she have shown her
wifely devotion, how keenly would she have made him feel his meanness, if she
had risen and made the fire -- If she had risen, we say, and made the fire
under the bed, in order to rout him out all of a sudden! A woman who throws away such a chance as that
is false to her duty and to her sex.
1878
When a lover leaves the house of his adored one at a late
hour in the evening, and walks musingly homeward beneath the twinkling stars,
his fond fancy pictures her, clothed in white samite, resting sweetly upon her
pillow, with her unbound hair tossed about her sleeping face, and angels
bending over her sleeping couch whispering heavenly dreams. Perhaps at that very moment she is in the
pantry gnawing hungrily on a ham bone.
1883
There is a good deal of sport poked at women
for being afraid of mice, but men are bigger cowards. Many men never go up fishing unless they take
demijohns of whiskey along for fear they will be bitten by a snake.
1884
When we were young we were
taught that certain rules in life, if carried out would bring us the respect
and esteem of our fellowmen, but we have learned by experience, that many of
them have a tendency to produce a different result.
For instance, let a young
man become a miserable sot, a worthless apology for a man, let him commit acts and
crimes that are too low to be put in the paper, misuse his parents, defraud his
creditors, and break the hearts of many of the gentler sex, and then let him
join some organization that claims to be for reform and he is immediately
(before he has proved to the world, by living virtuous life for months and
years, that he has truly reformed) the lion of the day. He is met with smiles and congratulations in
the store, on the street, and is at once admitted into the best society, because he is such a fine fellow,
such a model of a man, while on the otherhand, the young man that has always
lived a virtuous life and been an honor to society, and a credit to his Maker,
is hardly noticed, or he may receive the compliment that he is too “clever and
bashful” to commit a disgraceful act, and so goes the world.
“When a lovely woman stoops
to folly” the best thing she can do is die.
1884
Many a man thinks that it is his goodness which keeps him
from crime, when it is only his full stomach.
On half allowance he would be as ugly and knavish as anybody. Don’t
mistake potatoes from principles
1887
Men !!!!
When Attending the Theatre
--
What are you there for?
To enjoy yourself and annoy everyone else as
much as you possibly can.
Always seat yourself so as to incommode your
neighbors. If a slender, nervous woman
is next to you, bully her until she gives up half her allotted space to
you. This can be done by placing your
elbow on the arm of the seat and then turning your body till the elbow has sunk
into her side.
If her escort should be so unconventional as to complain,
smile helplessly and point to the lady on the other side of you, as much as to
say that you are being pushed over against your will.
If a woman in front wears a big hat and you are a man,
you must stand it, but if you are a woman, you can at least get even. Remark to your escort, “Just see how easily
you men are fooled. Now, when we came in you thought the lace on that hat was
real guipure, but it’s nothing but cheap cotton imitation, and now I remember
seeing a lot of it on one of the cheap dry goods stores’ bargain counters the
other day.” A few remarks like that in a
soprano tone will make the wearer of the hat wish she were dead.
Always step on the dress of the woman in front of you if
you can.
Kick the hat under the seat in front at every
opportunity; or, if a man, spit tobacco juice so that it will be-spatter
it. This is peculiarly effective with a
light felt hat.
Let all your remarks about the play be in a loud tone.
1889
ADVICE TO GIRLS WHO
CONTEMPLATE MATRIMONY
A man’s heart is ensnared by a pretty hand, nice teeth, a
round, low voice, frank eyes, beautiful hair; by the way a girl walks, talks,
plays, rides; by her gifts, her smile, her amiability, good taste, generosity,
or the manner in which she greets, fascinates or abuses him. She may not know how she won him, but if she
doesn’t know how to keep him the best thing for her to do is find out. There are many things we know by intuition;
the rest have to be learned by experience.
Conscious of her abilities and inabilities as a wife, a wise woman will
learn to keep a husband just as she learns how to keep a house.
Men are susceptible; even more so than women.
There is this difference:
The average man inquires whether he is in condition to marry. The average woman doesn’t. If the man pleases her fancy, she is
satisfied. She may not be able to play
any part in the new drama except to hang upon his neck and coax to be petted.
Such a wife is a burden to any man. She
doesn’t understand him; neither does she know the chief constituents of a home.
The wife who takes an interest in her home, in her
husband’s affairs, and finds pleasure in contributing to his comfort and
happiness, is a treasure of greater value than a gold mine.
The wife who has no higher ambition than to be kept alive
is a poor investment.
The average man has little use for a smart woman. She is full of schemes, and is ambitious to
shine. Her disposition is anything but
domestic, and she is not the most genial companion for a man whose mind is
taken up with business affairs. He
doesn’t care how intelligent she is, but he hasn’t much use for her if she is
smart.
Men like to be looked up at, depended on, quoted, and
referred. An ugly temper is a trial that
few women are able to endure. The only
cure is silence. You can’t kiss a
furious man; it only makes him worse.
The thing to do is to keep still, let him cool and let the matter
drop. He will respect your sense and
come to terms of his own accord.
Men must be taken as they are, not as they should be;
they improve under the refining influence of mutual love, and he is a wretched
specimen of humanity who cannot be counted on to shield his wife from the
buffets of the world and be an anchor when youth and beauty have proved
unfaithful.
To be born a woman is to be born a martyr, but the
husband that is worth wedding is worth keeping; and if a little artifice, a
pleasant smile, a contented heart, forbearance, devotion and tact will hold
him, by all means let him be held.
1889
Women’s suffrage has been defeated in the Massachusetts
legislature this year by about the same vote as in previous years. The cause lacks the one impulse to give it
effect, and that is the growth of the sentiment among the women themselves that
it would be beneficial to them or advantageous to the commonwealth. Until this takes place its advocacy will be
an artificial demand for a gift which is not wanted.
1889
Tribute to Women
True, she cannot sharpen a
pencil, and, outside of commercial circles, she can’t tie a package to make it
look like anything save a crooked cross section of chaos; but land of miracles
see what she can do with a pan!
She cannot walk so may miles around a billiard table with
nothing to eat, and nothing (to speak of) to drink, but she can walk the floor
all night with a fretful baby. She can
ride five hundred miles without going into a smoking car to rest (and get away
from the children). She can enjoy an
evening visit without smoking half a dozen cigars. She can endure the distraction of a house
full of children all day, while her husband sends them all to bed before he has
been home an hour.
A boy with a
sister is fortunate, a fellow with a cousin is to be envied, a young man with a
sweetheart is happy, and a man with a good wife is thrice blessed more than
they all.
1889
A Few Don’ts for Girls
Girls, don’t be slovenly, it shows a lack of that innate
culture and
refinement of the mind that
belongs to the true lady.
Don’t endeavor to be odd in dress; it is as objectionable
as being overly fashionable.
Don’t follow fashion in dress unless it accords with the dictates
of reason
and Good sense.
Don’t forget that pure-minded, intelligent women are not
strictly fashionable.
Sensible persons have more
important subjects about which to think.
Don’t wear tight corsets if you value health. Women who persist in tight lacing
should be sent to where
they could revel in the luxury of a straight jacket.
Don’t tattle.
Tattling is the thorns and briars of speech and is detrimental morally
and mentally.
Don’t cultivate the habit of criticizing every person and
everything you see; it is
evidence you are a better
subject for criticism than anything else.
Don’t forget that your best dower is the dower of perfect
womanliness.
Don’t forget that a good domestic education will give
more real enjoyment and
comfort when married than
any amount of superfluous accomplishments.
Don’t forget that marriage makes or mars two lives.
Don’t marry a man who has sown many wild oats. It is a sure crop and you may
live to reap the harvest.
Don’t marry a man in the habit of drinking. Better take Rough on Tipplers, that is a
grain of sense.
Don’t marry a dude; he is a cross between a peacock, a
donkey, and a tailor’s
Goose -- an unclassified
nothing.
.
Don’t marry an irreligious man. Impiety is a canker worm that eats up every
blossom in the garden of
manhood.
Don’t forget that the superstructure of wedded happiness
must be based on the
foundation of affinity,
compatibility and true love, or it must ever prove a failure.
Pray don’t read the
foregoing paragraphs and cast them aside as worth less
without weighing them in
the scales of light and reason.
1891
While we have respect for
earnest women, and recognize their power in reforms, charities, and in work of
religion and of ethics, the professional woman-stumper has never been an
admirable being in any era of America.
The woman who cannot speak in pubic is better then the woman who
does. The capability and habit of the
latter class to gets press and popular notice is neither a criterion nor a
reward of merit. The women of the home,
not the women of the platform, are the womanly women, the meritorious ones.
1891
It does not matter much to
a boy whether he is good looking or the reverse. He is not obliged to wait for somebody to ask
him to dance, and his matrimonial prospects don’t appear to suffer any serious
discount from personal shortages that would send a girl’s stock away down below
par, or even put her out of the market altogether. One never sees a man so hideous or repulsive
but that some woman is ready to marry him, if he will only marry her, but men
are generally left to run to waste as unappropriated blessings. The “handsome is as handsome does” theory
won’t hold at all after we get out of the nursery, and a little experience soon
convinces us that it is a fraud and a delusion, like any other domestic action
about the drumstick being the choicest part of the fowl, with which our elders
used to impose upon unsuspecting simplicity of our childhood.
The ugly girls never get drives in the park nor free
seats in the theater; and as for ice cream and French candy, no matter how
handsomely they deport themselves, shouldn’t they know the taste of either if
they waited to have it bestowed as a reward of merit. Indeed, the expensiveness of being an ugly
girl is one of the worst things about it; there are no perquisites. They gets no plums out of life’s pudding, for
under present conditions men do the carving, and as one of them says, “All the
fine things we think and say about women apply to those only who are tolerably
good-looking or graceful.”
Now, suppose the same rule
applied to men and that only the good-looking ones could hope to attain to wealth
and distinction; suppose, for instance, that the famous wart on Oliver
Cromwell’s nose had been sufficient to condemn him to obscurity, as it
inevitably would have done had he been a woman; suppose Grover Cleveland’s too
ample girth of waist had kept him out of he White House, as it certainly would
have kept Mrs. Cleveland out had she been the unlucky possessor of that
inconvenient superfluity; or suppose that David B. Hill’s bald pate had
rendered him ineligible to the office of
governor of New York, as we have not the shadow of a doubt that a bald head
would render any woman in America ineligible to the office of governor’s wife;
suppose, in fact, that a bald head was sufficient to blast any man’s prospect
in life as effectually as it would in a woman’s—we think most of the
middle-aged men, at least those into whose hands this paper may fall, will
admit that that would be a little hard.
And, in fact, isn’t it a little hard that anybody’s destiny in life
should be made to depend irretrievably upon accident, over which they have no
control, such as having been born with a red head or a pug nose? But this is the law under which women have
lived since beginning of time and it doesn’t give the ugly girls a fair chance.
1891
Some young ladies cannot distinguish the difference
between the hair on a man’s head and a lady’s wrap, especially when riding in a
railroad train on the way home from operas.
1896
Women Should Take More Time
Between Meals
It wouldn’t make much difference as to how
much a woman ate, says a publication which claims to be an authority on
culinary topics, if she would only wait long enough between meals to get
hungry, but doesn’t, and there’s where the trouble begins. Nature is a tenacious old jade. Given time, she will digest and assimilate
almost anything that the stomach can retain.
It is a well-known fact that spells of adverse fortune
are invariably accompanied by superior physical conditions. Brokers’ families never looked so well as
during a panic. High-toned criminals’
invariably come out of prison in better health and face than they had when they
went in. And who has not remarked the
refinement of spirit and nature born of sorrow and temperance in bereaved families.
It is well worth the expense of a trip to Carlsbad or Aix-les-Bains -- not only
to take the waters, but to learn how not to take the foods that deform the
body.
Unless a woman washes or works for a living she doesn’t
need three meals any day of her life. It
takes systematic work to consume that much fuel. Engineers are too clever to fill the furnace
with coal unless there is a trip to make, and elevator to run or work to do.
It doesn’t matter what a man looks like, so long as he is
decent and healthy, but it is the duty of every gentle woman to be as
good-looking as her circumstances will permit/ Women often eat themselves ugly,
ill and brutal.
1898
At a recent school board examination for girls one of the
tasks was an essay on boys, and this was one of the compositions, just as it
was handed in by a girl of 12:
The boy is not an animal,
yet they can be heard to a considerable distance. When a boy hollers he opens his big mouth
like frogs, but girls hold their tongue till they are spoken to and then they
answer respectable and tell just how it was.
A boy thinks himself clever because he can wade where it is deep, but
God made the dry land for every living thing, and rested on the seventh
day. When the boy grows up he is called
a husband, and then he stops wading and stays out nights, but the grew-up girl
is a widow and keeps house.
1898
Nowadays when men are
trying to do everything it is not strange that many things are overdone. It is not strange that there are all kinds of
physical and mental disturbances. If a woman who is a doctor, or a lawyer, or a
journalist, or in business would not try to be a society woman too it might be
different, but the woman who knows when she has done a day’s work has yet to be
born. Usually a woman’s way is to keep
doing until she drops. Working in this
manner has manifold evils. The most common trouble resulting from over
exertion, either mentally or physically, is constipation of the bowels, with
all its attendant horrors.
1899
Many people have a
reputation for being virtuous when they are only discreet.
1899
Chapter
6
HOW
TO
Without TV and its
ubiquitous experts to demonstrate how certain things should be done, the ladies
had nowhere to turn for advice except to the newspapers and magazines of the
day. Experts of the day were not at all
hesitant to tell their readers exactly how to sit on a horse, how to dust a
room, how to get and keep a man, or how to bring up a child.
Could it be that some of the
instructions were written in jest?
INTERESTING TO MOTHERS
We have an infallible means of keeping babies, from
1855
A good way to make use of
old table cloths which are no longer suitable for the table, is to cut them in
good-sized pieces and keep them in a drawer in the pantry, and on baking days
bring them forth to lay the warm bread, or cookies, or cakes upon. They may take the place of towels in many
other ways and prove a substantial economy.
1855
A woman should sit on a horse thus: The head straight,
easy turning upon the shoulders in any direction without involving a movement
of the body. The eyes fixed straight to
the front, looking between the horse’s ears, and always in the direction in
which she is going. The upper part of
the body easy, flexible and straight.
The lower part of the body, firm without stiffness. The shoulders well back and in the same
line. The arms falling naturally. The forearm bent. The wrists on a level with the elbows. The reins held in each hand. The finger firmly closed, facing each other,
with the thumbs extended on the ends of the lines. The right foot falling naturally on the
pommel of the saddle, the left foot in the stirrup without leaning on it. The part of the right leg between the knee
and the hip joint should be turned on its outer or right side and should press
throughout the length of the saddle. The
knees should, in their respective positions, be continually in contact, without
an exception. The lower or movable part
of the legs plays upon the immovable at the knee joint, the exception being
when the rider rises to trot, at which time the upper part of the leaves the
saddle. (sic)
1884
A great deal of attention should be given to the proper
airing of the mattress every morning, and at least once a week a stiff brush
should remove the dust which will accumulate even in the best ordered house,
around and under the tufts bits of cotton or the bits of leather, or whatever
is used to tack the mattress with.
Attention should also be directed to the edges of the mattress, where
the braid is sewed on for dust sifts under that. Where the bed-room is also the dressing room,
dust cannot be avoided, but it may be at least changed and it need not be
allowed to accumulate.
1885
The proper way to dust a room is to begin with the
walls. Pin several thicknesses of cloth
over a broom and sweep the walls down thoroughly, leaving at the same time all
the doors and windows open. This matter
of sweeping the walls is important and should be done once a week in rooms that
are much used. Then with a damp cloth wipe off the picture cords or wires, the
backs of all the picture frames and the tops of the door and window frames. If there is any danger of injuring pictures
or frames with a damp cloth use a dry one, but wipe them off carefully. As often as you can get a good draft which
will carry the dust out of the window, shake and beat the curtains, whether
they be Holland, scrim or what not, for they are prime sinners in the matter of
harboring dust. The window -- sash, sill
and glass -- should also receive attention.
Use a large cloth with half of it well dampened for dusting, the dry end
being used to wipe off small articles that might be injured by dampness -- and
be careful that you manipulate the cloth so as to wipe the dust into it and
keep it there. If it gets dirty have a
clean one, and always wash them out and scald them after using. If there are inside shutters to the windows
they need to be cared for almost as tenderly as a baby. A thorough cleaning every week, carefully
wiping both upper and under sides of the slats is the only thing that will keep
them in decent order. A room is not
thoroughly dusted until all the furniture and woodwork and gas fixtures have
been cleaned with a damp duster.
Upholstered furniture should be taken out, brushed all over and then
wiped with a damp cloth, not forgetting the underside.
1887
HOW TO CARE FOR A BABY
The first natural right of a baby is to have good
ancestors. It is first the duty of every
father and mother to see that their babies have honest, healthy, intelligent
parents. But, after the child is born,
his first great need is quiet. The
natural condition of healthy babies is serene contentment. Nothing should be allowed to disturb the
regal repose of his little majesty, under the canopy of his cradle. Let the little king lie in state, in his
swaddling clothes, and let his rest, under his blanket, be as inviolate as
that of an emperor under his purple robe.
But it is no exaggeration to say that thousands of babies
die every year for the lack of adequate rest.
They are “jounced” by grandpa, poked by grandma, tossed and tumbled by
mama, and generally shaken up and demoralized by rampant and fiercely
affectionate papa.
The baby is thus made the means of amusement for the
whole family circle. He is made to
furnish entertainment for the whole house.
He is encouraged to laugh, and crow and coo. Few realize what a great mental effort, on
the baby’s part, is required for these manifestations. It is as much strain for the little
undeveloped fellow as for the poet to write an immortal song, or the president
to write his annual message
Let the baby grow like a plant, unconsciously absorb the
mother’s love as a flower absorbs the sunshine, and feel the all-embracing care
about him as the grass feels the dew.
Do not try to make
the baby “notice.”
Do not try to make him “forward”.
Do not try to push him ahead of your neighbor’s baby.
But, you ask:
“Shall we let the baby grow up dull and stupid?” By no means; simply let him grow up
naturally.
“Blessed is the mother,” said a lady, thoroughly
experienced in domestic affairs -- “blessed is the mother whose baby is a “lunk
head.” Stupid babies make wise men and
women. A baby is a little more than a
plant. Let him vegetate in his infancy,
and be content to wait for his intellect’s development until a later date.
Give babies a chance to rest while they are babies. They will probably never get a chance
afterward.
“Baby sleep a little
longer,
Till the little limbs are
stronger.
If she sleeps a little
longer,
Baby, too, shall fly away.”
1889
HOW TO WASH SILK STOCKINGS
Do your silk stockings
ever get spoiled in the wash? Have them
done at home and make the maid follow these directions, advises an English
correspondent.
No soap must be rubbed
on the articles. Before commencing, have
ready two hot irons and two pans of water.
In one pan pour hot water and in the other cold, adding a wine glass of
common vinegar to each. Make the hot
water into a creamy lather of suitable consistency, from the recipe given for
“soap jelly”.
Wash each stocking
separately in the hot water, and rub carefully, commencing at the toe. Squeeze it out, place it in the rinse-water
but on no account wring them. Roll
separately in a dry cloth. Now take the
stockings, iron them each on the wrong side and finish them on the right,
taking care to leave no creases. If
these instructions are properly carried out, you may wash with safety the most
brilliant colors.
For the “soap Jelly”
take a half a pound of yellow soap and shave finely into a sauce-pan with one
quart of water. Stand it by the fire
until it simmers, and let it remain until cold, when it will have the
appearance of a stiff jelly.
1899
IRONING
A SHIRT WAIST
Not infrequently a young
woman finds it necessary to launder a shirt waist at home for some emergency
when the laundryman or the home servant cannot do it. Hence these directions for ironing the waist:
To iron summer shirt waists so that they will look like new it is needful to
have them starched evenly with Defiance starch, then made perfectly smooth and
rolled tight in a damp cloth, to be laid away two or three hours. When ironing have a bowl of water and a clean
piece of muslin beside the ironing board.
Have your iron hot, but not sufficiently so to scorch, and absolutely
clean. Begin by ironing the back, then
the front sides and the sleeves, followed by the neckband and the cuffs. When wrinkles appear apply the damp cloth and
remove them. Always iron from the top of
the waist to the bottom. If there are
plaits in the front iron them downward, after first raising each one with a
blunt knife, and with the edge of the iron follow every line of stitching to
give it distinctness. After the shirt
waist is ironed it should be well aired by the fire or in the sun before it is
folded and put away.
1902
HOW TO JUDGE A WOMAN
You can tell the
good-natured girl without a chart to reveal her whereabouts. All you have to do
is look at her face.
There is a man who is giving drawing room
lectures upon faces. He reads the
character, not by the head or the hand, but by the face.
“You take a face that is open,” says the
lecturer, “and you find a peculiarly frank disposition. The girl who can laugh and show her teeth,
broadening her mouth into a wide smile, is a girl who has a spirit, one who
would not deceive you!
Chapter 7
TAKE MY
ADVICE
The strongest human
instinct is to impart information.
That was just as true one
hundred fifty years ago when the only means of conveying information was via
the printed word and the lecture hall, as it is now.
Ann Landers, Dear Abby, Dr.
Phil, and their like could not exist without the desire to share information
and/or advice.
It is up to the reader to
decide which of the following pieces of advice to accept and which to consign
to the recycle bin.
1851
1851
AGE FOR ENTERING MATRIMONY
The most proper age for entering the holy bonds of
matrimony has been discussed but never settled.
I am entitled to my opinions; and although I cannot here give the
grounds on which it rests, the reader may take it for granted, that I could
adduce were this the proper place, a great number of reasons, both moral and
physical, for the dogma I am about to propound.
The maxim which I would inculcate, is this -- that matrimony should not
be contracted before the first year of the fourth septenniad, on the part of
females, nor before the last year of the same in the case of the male; in other
words, the female should be at least 21, and the male 28 years old. That there should be seven years difference
between the ages of the sexes, at whatever period of life the solemn contract
is entered upon, need not be urged, as it is universally admitted there is a
difference of seven years, not in the actual duration of life in the two sexes,
but in the stamina of the constitution—the symmetry of the form, and the
lineaments of the face.
1852
Women, young women, either
believe falsely or judge harshly of men in one thing: you, young loving creature, who dream of your
lover by night and by day -- you fancy he does the same of you? He does not -- he cannot; nor is it right he
should. One hour, perhaps, your presence
has captivated him, subdued him even to weakness, the next he will be in the
world, working his way as a man among men, forgetting for the time being, your
very existence. Possibly if you saw him,
his outer self hard and stern, so different to the self you know, would strike
you with pain. Or else his inner and
diviner self, higher than you dream of, would turn coldly from your
insignificant love.
Yet all this must be; you have no right to murmur. You cannot rule a man’s soul -- no women ever
did -- except by holding unworthy sway over unworthy passions. Be content if you lie in his heart as that
heart lies in his bosom -- deep and calm -- his beating unseen, uncounted,
often times unfelt; but still giving life to his whole being.
1852
No wise young woman will marry a man who treats either
his mother or sister with disrespect or neglect. No one man in a hundred of that class will
make even a decent husband.
Poverty is not a bar to marriage, but meanness or
drunkenness or laziness, or the lack of virtues first mentioned, is, which
neither good looks nor money nor family connections should be allowed to
influence.
1884
ADVICE TO GIRLS WHO
CONTEMPLATE MATRIMONY
Listen, Girls
A man’s heart is ensnared
by a pretty hand, nice teeth, a round, low voice, frank eyes, beautiful hair;
by the way a girl walks, talks, plays, rides; by her gifts, her smiles, her
amiability, good taste, generosity, or the manner in which she greets,
fascinates or abuses him. She may not
know how she won him, but if she doesn’t know how to keep him the best thing
for her to do is find out. There are
many things we know by intuition; the rest have to be learned by experience. Conscious of her abilities and inabilities as
a wife, a wise woman will learn to keep a husband just as she learns how to
keep house.
Men are susceptible; even
more so than women.
There is this difference:
The average man inquires whether he is in condition to marry. The average woman doesn’t. If the man pleases her fancy, she is
satisfied. She may not be able to play
any part in the new drama except to hang upon his neck and coax to be petted.
Such a wife is a burden to
any man. She doesn’t understand him;
neither does she know the chief constituents of a home.
The wife who takes an
interest in her home, in her husband’s affairs, and finds pleasure in
contributing to his comfort and happiness, is a treasure of greater value than
a gold mine.
The wife who has no higher
ambition than to be kept alive is a poor investment.
The average man has very
little use for a smart woman. She is
full of schemes, and is ambitious to shine.
Her disposition is anything but domestic, and she is not the most genial
companion for a man whose mind is taken up with business affairs. He doesn’t care how intelligent she is, but
he hasn’t much use for her if she is smart.
Men like to be looked up
at, depended on, quoted, and referred.
An ugly temper is a trial that few women are able to endure. The only cure is silence. You can’t kiss a furious man; it only makes
him worse. The thing to do is to keep still,
let him cool and let the matter drop. He
will respect your sense and come to terms of his own accord.
Men must be taken as they
are, not as they should be; they improve under the refining influence of mutual
love, and he is a wretched specimen of humanity who can not be counted on to
shield his wife from the buffets of he world and be an anchor when youth and beauty
have proved unfaithful.
To be born a woman is to be
born a martyr, but the husband that is worth wedding is worth keeping; and if a
little artifice, a pleasant smile, a contented heart, forbearance, devotion and
tact will hold him, by all means let him be held.
1889
Don’t snub a boy because he
wears shabby clothes. When Edison, the
inventor of the telephone, (sic) first entered Boston, he wore a pair of yellow
linen breeches in the depth of winter.
Don’t snub a boy because
his home is plain and unpretending.
Abraham Lincoln’s early home was a log cabin.
Don’t snub a boy because of
dullness in his lessons. Hogarth, the
celebrated painter and engraver, was a stupid boy at his books.
Don’t snub a boy because of
the ignorance of his parents.
Shakespeare, the world’s poet was the son of a man who was unable to
write his own name.
Don’t snub a boy because he
chooses a humble trade. The author of
Pilgrim’s Progress was a tinker.
Don’t snub a boy because of
physical disabilities. Milton was blind.
Don’t snub a boy because he
stutters. Demosthenes, the great orator
of Greece, over came a harsh and stammering voice.
1887
THE KISS PERFECTED
Mrs. Langtry has invented a
kiss that double discounts anything of the kind ever attempted by Emma
Abbot. In a memorable scene of one
production, Mrs. Langtry, playing the part of Lady Clancarty, finds her husband
has escaped from his pursuers through an open window into her room.
She stands with her back to
the audience clear down the stage, near the footlights. The husband looks at her a moment and then
rushes wildly into her arms. They both
swing around and expose their profiles to the audience. Then they hold each other at arms
length.
Then her bosom heaves and
he pants. Then her head falls upon his
breast, reclining backward. There is a
crimson blush suffusing her charming face.
Then he looks down at her, and she looks up at him. Then there is a perceptible pressure around
the waist.
Then he suddenly places his
lips to hers. Then she clasps him around
the head. Then there is a soft, gurgling
sound, as of water escaping from a kitchen sink. Then they are, as it were, glued
together. Then all is still.
Women in the audience
become nervous. Bald-headed men are
paralyzed. Men around town have their
watches out timing this. One second,
two, three, four, five, six, seven -- and then there is an explosion, as if the
bung had blown out of a beer barrel.
It is all over.
That is the Langtry kiss.
1889
TAKE SEATS ON THE FLOOR
It is the custom of nearly
every young girl to sit on the floor while putting on her shoes. Indeed, many women keep up the habit to
middle-age, though full-fledged womanhood not infrequently displays such
embonpoint as would make such a course difficult.
Chapter 8
COSMETICS
Although it was generally
held, by the male population, that the more the feminine face was uncovered the
better it looked, and the frequent reiteration of “The natural look is the beautiful
look,” the ladies were then, as they are now, constantly striving to improve
upon the body with which Nature had endowed them. Without huge laboratories to provide
cosmetics which promised unbelievable results, without even Pond’s Cold Cream,
the ladies were left to their own devises to improve their skin, and their
bodies...
RECEIPT FOR GOOD HEALTH AND
LOOKS
We can safely recommend the following directions for
attaining habitual good health and good looks to all our friends:
For a clear complexion -- Rise early, use plenty of fresh
water, observe the strictest moderation in diet, and take plenty of exercise in
the open air. The same plan will be
found beneficial in other respects.
Those who regularly pursue it generally possess coral lips, white teeth
and pure breath.
To give brilliancy to the eyes -- Shut them early at
night, and open them early in the morning; let the mind be constantly intent on
the acquisition of useful knowledge, or on the exercise of benevolent
feelings. This will scarcely ever fail
to impart to the eyes an intelligent and amiable expression.
To preserve the forehead
from wrinkles -- Cultivate contentment, calmness and benignity of spirit; and
never on any account indulge a murmuring and resentful, or a malevolent
feeling.
By constant adherence to
the above simple rules, many females have preserved their attractions even to
the age of fourscore years and upwards.
1855
The nature of the female face is such that the more of it
uncovered the better it looks, whereas nine women out of ten who are provided
with bangs have a happy resemblance to rabbits peeping out of a brush
heap. The only unfortunate feature about
the disappearance of the bang is the dread of what is to come after it. It is to go, that much is settled; but
whether the women are to have their heads or wear wigs like those which
surmounted the head of Lois XIV, is a question that must fill the world with
awe, and the fashion papers with matter for some time to come.
1884
A young lady of this city who has been addicted to
painting her lips as well as her
cheeks and eyelashes, is
now under treatment to reduce the size of her lips, which have
become “horribly enlarged”
by chemical poison.
1885
A DECEIVED WOMAN
Is the lady who uses
cosmetics, face lotions, white lead, bismuth powders, arsenic, etc., in the
belief of enriching and beautifying the complexion? It is but temporary and ultimately destroys
the skin beyond the power of nature to restore.
Stop it ! Stop it now, and use
only D. Harter’s Iron Tonic, which imparts the vigor and loveliness of youth.
1887
With no Martha Stewart
around to show and tell them how certain things should be done, the ladies had
nowhere to turn except to the newspapers and magazines of the day. “Experts” were not at all hesitant to tell
their readers exactly how to sit on a horse or how to dust a room. Could it be that some of the instructions
were written in jest?
Chapter 9
JUST GOOD
ADVICE
A woman should sit on a horse thus: The head straight, easy turning upon the
shoulders in any direction without involving a movement of the body. The eyes fixed straight to the front, looking
between the horse’s ears, and always in the direction in which she is
going. The upper part of the body easy,
flexible and straight. The lower part of
the body, firm without stiffness. The shoulders well back and in the same line. The arms falling naturally. The forearm bent. The wrists on a level with the elbows. The reins held in each hand. The fingers firmly closed, facing each other,
with the thumbs extended on the ends of the lines. The right foot falling naturally on the
pommel of the saddle, the left foot in the stirrup without leaning on it. The part of the right leg between the knee
and the hip joint should be turned on its outer or right side and should press
throughout the length of the saddle. The
knees should, in their respective positions, be continually in contact, without
an exception. The lower or movable part
of the leg plays upon the immovable at the knee joint, the sole exception being
when the rider rises to trot, at which time the upper part of the leaves the
saddle. (sic)
1884
A great deal of attention should be given to the proper
airing of the mattress every morning, and at least once a week a stiff brush
should remove the dust which will accumulate, even in the best ordered house,
around and under the tufts bits of cotton or the bits of leather, or whatever
is used to tack the mattress with.
Attention should also be directed to the edge of the mattress, where the
braid is sewed on for dust sifts under that.
Where the bed-room is also the dressing room, dust cannot be avoided,
but it may be at least changed and it need not be allowed to accumulate.
1885
A good way to make use of old red table
cloths which are no longer suitable for the table, is to cut them in good-sized
pieces and keep them in a drawer in the pantry, and on baking days bring them
forth to lay the warm bread, or cookies, or cakes upon. They may take the place of towels in many
other ways and prove a substantial economy.
1885.
INTERESTING TO MOTHERS
We have an infallible means of keeping babies, from
1855
HOW TO DUST A ROOM
The proper way to dust a room is to begin with the
walls. Pin several thicknesses of cloth
over a broom and sweep the walls down thoroughly, leaving at the same time all
the doors and windows open. This matter
of sweeping the walls is important and should be done once a week in rooms that
are much used. Then with a damp cloth
wipe off the picture cords or wires, the backs of all the picture frames and
the tops of the door and window frames.
If there is any danger of injuring pictures or frames with a damp cloth
use a dry one, but wipe them off carefully.
As often as you can get a good draft which will carry the dust out of
the window, shake and beat the curtains, whether they be Holland, scrim or what
not, for they are prime sinners in the matter of harboring dust. The window -- sash, sill and glass -- should
also receive attention. Use a large
cloth with half of it well dampened for dusting, the dry end being used to wipe
off small articles that might be injured by dampness -- and be careful that you
manipulate the cloth so as to wipe the dust into it and keep it there. If it gets dirty have a clean one, and always
wash them out and scald them after using. If there are inside shutters to the
windows they need to be cared for almost as tenderly as a baby. A thorough cleaning every week, carefully
wiping both upper and under sides of the slats, is the only thing that will
keep them in decent order. A room is not thoroughly dusted until all the
furniture and woodwork and gas fixtures should have been cleaned with a damp
duster. Upholstered furniture should be
taken out, brushed all over and then wiped with a damp cloth, not forgetting
the underside.
1887
How to Care for a Baby
The first natural right of a baby is to have good
ancestors. It is first the duty of every
father and mother to see that their babies have honest, healthy, intelligent
parents.
But, after the child is
born, his first great need is quiet. The
natural condition of healthy babyhood is serene contentment. Nothing should be allowed to disturb the
regal repose of his little majesty, under the canopy of his cradle. Let the little king lie in state, in his
swaddling clothes, and let his rest, under his blanket, be as inviolate as that
of an emperor under his purple robe.
But it is no exaggeration to say that thousands of babies
die every year for the lack of adequate rest.
They are “jounced” by grandpa, poked by grandma, tossed and tumbled by
mama, and generally shaken up and demoralized by rampant and fiercely
affectionate papa.
The baby is thus made the means of amusement for the w
hole family circle. He is made to
furnish entertainment for the whole house.
He is encouraged to laugh, and crow and coo. Few realize what a great mental effort, on
the baby’s part, is required for these manifestations. It is as much strain for the little
undeveloped fellow as for a poet to write an immortal song, or the president to
write his annual message.
Let the baby grow like a
plant, unconsciously absorb the mother’s love as a flower absorbs the sunshine,
and feel the all-embracing care about him as the grass feels the dew.
Do not try to make the baby
“notice.”
Do not try to make him
”forward.”
Do not try to push him
ahead of your neighbor’s baby.
But, you ask: “Shall we let the baby grow up dull and
stupid?” By no means; simply let him
grow up naturally.
“Blessed is the mother”
said a lady, thoroughly experienced in domestic affairs -- “blessed is the
mother whose baby is a “lunk head.’”
Stupid babies make wise men and women.
A baby is a little more than a plant.
Let him vegetate in his infancy, and be content to wait for his
intellect’s development until a later date.
Give babies a chance to
rest while they are babies. They will
probably never get a chance afterward.
“Baby sleep a little
longer,
Till the little limbs are
stronger.
If she sleeps a little
longer,
Baby, too, shall fly away.”
1889
HOW TO WASH SILK STOCKINGS
Do your silk stockings ever
get spoiled in the wash? Have them done
at home and make the maid follow these directions, advises an English
correspondent.
No soap must be rubbed on the articles. Before commencing, have ready two hot irons
and two pans of water. In one pan pour
hot water and in the other cold, adding a wine glass of common vinegar to
each. Make the hot water into a creamy
lather of suitable consistency, from the recipe given for “soap jelly.”
Wash each stocking
separately in the hot water, and rub carefully, commencing at the toe. Squeeze it out, place it in the rinse-water
but on no account wring them. Roll
separately in a dry cloth. Now take the
stockings, iron them each on the wrong side and finish them on the right,
taking care to leave no creases. If
these instructions are properly carried out, you may wash with safety the most
brilliant colors.
For the “soap jelly” take
half a pound of yellow soap and shave it finely into a sauce-pan with one quart
of water. Stand it by the fire until it
simmers, and let it remain until cold, when it will have the appearance of a
stiff jelly.
1889
IRONING A SHIRT WAIST
Not infrequently a young woman finds it necessary to
launder a shirt waist at home for some emergency when the laundryman or the home servant
cannot do it. Hence these directions for
ironing the waist: To iron summer shirt
waists so that they will look like new it is needful to have them starched
evenly with Defiance starch, then made perfectly smooth and rolled tight in a
damp cloth, to be laid away two or three hours.
When ironing have a bowl of water and a clean piece of muslin beside the
ironing board. Have your iron hot, but
not sufficiently so to scorch, and absolutely clean. Begin by ironing the back, then the front
sides and the sleeves, followed by the neckband and the cuffs. When wrinkles appear apply the damp cloth and
remove them. Always iron from the top of
the waist to the bottom. If there are
plaits in the front iron them downward, after first raising each one with a
blunt knife, and with the edge of the iron follow every line of stitching to
give it distinctness. After the shirt
waist is ironed it should be well aired by the fire or in the sun before it is
folded and put away, says the Philadelphia Inquirer.
1902
HOW TO JUDGE A WOMAN
You can tell the
good-natured girl without a chart to reveal her whereabouts. All you have to do is look at her face.
There is a man who is
giving drawing room lectures upon faces.
He reads the character, not by
the head or the hand, but by the face.
“You take a face that is
open,” says the lecturer, “and you find a peculiarly frank disposition. The girl who can laugh and show her teeth,
broadening her mouth into a wide smile, is a girl who has a spirit, one who
would not deceive you.
“The woman who, when she
smiles, keeps her lips closed, is not the woman whom you can trust. She may not be dangerous, but she is
secretive. And, though she may tell you
the truth, she will not tell you the whole truth.
“But the open-mouthed girl may
have a quick temper, and she generally has.
Her upper lip is short and her temper is no longer than the upper lip.
“She gets angry in a hurry,
and it is flare-up with her. Soon over,
it may be, but, for a few minutes, the girl with a short upper lip, the
laughing mouth and the white teeth falls a victim to her own temper.
“It is usually supposed
that the girl with the quick temper is the girl of unfortunate disposition, the
girl to be avoided. But, as a rule, the
quicker the temper the sooner over; and the girl with the spirited disposition
is the one who is the nicest in the long run.
“Affectionate girls can
always be told by the mouth. The lips
never stay together, but they are always parted or ready to part.
“The affectionate girl is
the emotional girl. She always has her
sympathies on tap, and she can weep with you as readily as she can laugh. Her lips, which lie in a curve half parted,
will reveal all the emotions of her soul and at very short notice.
“The round, soft-chinned
girl is the girl to choose for a wife.
The woman who has no chin at all, or at least a sloping chin, is not the
woman who would make a good helpmate.
She would have no self-control whatever, and would fall victim to every
temptation that beset her pathway.
“The weak-chinned woman is
the woman who becomes addicted to alcoholism, who takes smoking and to the
minor vices of women. And it is the
weak-chinned woman who goes far beyond her husband’s income and cannot resist doing
so again and again.
“The weak-chinned woman is
not vicious, but just weak. There are a
great many estimable women who have no chin to speak of, but they are estimable
only because they have never been tempted to be otherwise.
“Quite the opposite is the
woman with the prominent chin. Here is
the woman who knows a thing or two, and does not hesitate to tell you so. She absolutely rules the household roost.
“The amiable woman has a
rounding chin, just chin enough and no more than enough. It may be a single chin, or its may be a
double chin. But its type is
unmistakable.
“This desirable type of
chin is curved, and sometimes dimpled.
It is rather wide, far from pointed, and it gradually broadens into full
happy cheeks.
”The beautiful type of chin
may not belong to the beautiful type of face, for a pretty chin does not make a
pretty woman. But it is one of the
straws which show which way the wind is blowing.
“The eye reveals character,
but unfortunately not so clearly as the other features, while the contrary is
supposed to be true.
“People are too much
influenced by the color of the eye, which is, after all, no guide, and they are
too much influenced by the size and the luster, whereas neither is any
indication whatever of character.
“Character is revealed in
the eyes by the expression, by the softness or by the hardness, by the glow, by
the appeal, by the way of looking at you.
“There are people who
cannot look you full in the eye, and these are the people who are not frank,
the people whose strategy, whose duplicity, whose methods and whose means are
not the best in the world.
“Dark eyes are supposed to
belong to the best type of soul. But
this, also, is a fallacy. Dark eyes are
more expressive than light eyes. They
are more capable of showing the emotions, they can say more than light
eyes. But they do not denote any
clearer, better character.
“On the contrary, there are
many people who argue wholly in favor of the light-eyed person, and say that
blue eyes are true eyes, and that black eyes and brown eyes are full of
duplicity.
“If you are going to read
character by the face, do not forget to read the complexion. The skin is a wonderful index of the state of
the body, and consequently of the habits and disposition of the body.
“The skin of a dyspeptic is
sallow. The skin of a morbid person,
troubled with the liver, is a greenish yellow, going into saffron. The skin of a woman who is lazy will be
mottled.
“Ill temper affects the
circulation of the blood; it sends the quick rush to the head; it paralyzes the
nerves of the skin and makes the hands and head hot and the feet cold.
“Women are more affected by
ill temper than they suppose, and a great many colds are caused by bad
circulation, which in turn is caused by an attack of bad temper.
“The skin that is perfectly
clear and pretty almost always belongs to the good natured woman, and a pair of
bright, pretty red cheeks are almost always the property of the girl with a
sunny disposition.
“It is said that an
ill-tempered woman cannot have a nice complexion. Certainly her chances are much better if she
will govern her temper, guard her tongue, and try in every possible way to
remain equally balanced through the trying scenes of life.
“The contour of a woman’s
face, while set to a certain degree by nature, is not arbitrarily fixed. She can influence it in every case, and
absolutely alter it in a great many cases.
“The forehead, which is
such an index of character, can be kept free from lines. It can be made smooth by massage and kept
smooth by care. It is one of the
features which show very plainly the disposition of the owner, and the feature
which, more than any others, first displays the mark of age and ill temper.”
WR
It has been said that the
strongest human instinct is to impart information. That was just as true
one-hundred and fifty years ago when the only means of imparting information
was the printed word and the lecture hall,
as it is now when we find the entire” media” predicated on that
principle. Ann Landers, Dear Abby, Dr.
Phil, and their like, could not exist without the desire to share information
and/or advice.
Chapter 10
TAKE MY ADVICE ONE LAST TIME
Trust not to uncertain
riches, but prepare yourselves for every emergency of life. Learn to work and be not dependent on
servants to make your bread, sweep your floors and darn your stockings. Above all, do not esteem too highly these
honorable young men who sustain themselves and their aged parents by the work
of their own hands, while you caress and receive into your company those lazy
popin-jays who appear to help themselves as long as they can keep soul and body
together, and get funds to live in fashion. If you are wise, you will look at
this subject as we do, and when you are old enough to become wise, you will
prefer an honest mechanic with not one cent to commence life, to the
fashionable loafer with a capital of ten thousand dollars. Whenever we hear remarked, “Such a lady has married
a fortune”, we tremble for her future prosperity. Riches left to children by wealthy parents
turn out to be a curse instead of a blessing.
Young women, remember this, instead of sounding the purse of your lovers
and examining the cut of their coats, look into t heir habits and their hearts,
mark if they have any trades and depend upon themselves -- See that they have
minds which will look above a butterfly existence. Talk not of the beautiful white skin, and the
soft delicate hand and the splendid form and fine appearance of a young gentleman.
1851
Ladies, why don’t you go
out in the open air and warm sunshine, and add luster to your eyes, bloom to
your cheeks, elasticity to your steps and vigor to your frame?
Take early morning exercises
-- let loose your corset strings, run up a hill for a wager, and down again for
fun. Roam in the fields, climb the
fences, leap the ditches, wade the brooks, and go home wit h an excellent
appetite. Liberty thus exercised and
enjoyed, will render you healthy, blooming and beautiful -- as lovely as the
Graces and prolific as Deverra. The
buxom, bright eyed, rosy cheeked, full breasted, bounding lass -- who can darn
a stocking, mend trousers, make her own frocks, command a regiment of pots and
kettles, feed the pigs, milk the cows, and be a lady withal in company -- is
just the sort of girl for any worthy young man to marry. In truth, what you need is more liberty and
less fashionable restraint -- more kitchen and less parlor -- more leg exercise
and less sofa -- more pudding and less piano -- more frankness and less mock
modesty -- more corned beef and less corsets -- more breakfast and less
bishop. Loosen yourselves a little. Breathe the pure atmosphere of freedom, and
become something nearly as lovely and beautiful as the God of nature designed.
1851
The most proper age for
entering the holy bonds of matrimony has been discussed but never settled. I am entitled to my opinions; and although I
cannot here give the grounds on which it rests, the reader may take it for
granted, that I could adduce were this the proper place, a great number of
reasons, both moral and physical, for the dogma I am about to propound. The maxim which I would inculcate, is this --
that matrimony should not be contracted before the first year of the fourth
septenniad, on the part of females, nor before the last year of the same in the
case of the male; in other words, the female should be at least 21, and the
male 28 years old. That there should be
seven years difference between the ages of the sexes, at whatever period of
life the solemn contract is entered upon, need not be urged, as it is
universally admitted there is a difference of seven years, not in the actual
duration of life in the two sexes, but in the stamina of the constitution --
the symmetry of the form, and the lineaments of the face.
1852
Women, young women, either
believe falsely or judge harshly of men in one thing. You, young loving creature, who dream of your
lover by night and by day -- you fancy he does the same of you? He does not—he cannot; nor is it right he
should. One hour, perhaps, your presence
has captivated him, subdued him even to weakness, the next he will be in the
world, working his way as a man among men, forgetting for the time being, your
very existence. Possibly if you saw him,
his outer self hard and stern, so different to the self you know, would strike
you with pain. Or else his inner and
diviner self, higher than you dream of, would turn coldly from your
insignificant love. Yet all this must
be; you have no right to murmur. You
cannot rule a man’s soul -- no women ever did -- except by holding unworthy
sway over unworthy passions. Be content
if you lie in his heart as that heart lies in his bosom -- deep and calm -- his
beating unseen, uncounted, often times unfelt; but still giving life to his
whole being.
1852
Going to bed we have always
considered one of the most sober, serious and solemn operations which a man can
be engaged in during the whole twenty-four hours. With a young lady it is altogether a
different thing. When bedtime arrives,
she trips upstairs with a candle in her hand,--if she has had pleasant company
during the evening—with some agreeable ideas in her head. The candle on the toilet; her luxuriant hair
is speedily emancipated from the thralldom of cobs and pins. If she usually wears “water curls,” or uses
the “iron,” her hair is brushed carefully from her forehead, and the whole mass
compactly secured; if not, why then her lovely tresses are soon hid in
innumerable bits of paper. This task
accomplished, a nightcap appears, edged, maybe, with plain muslin, or maybe
with levy lace which hides all, save her own sweet countenance. As soon as she ties the strings, probably takes
a peep in her glass, and half smiles and half blushes at what she sees--. The light is out—her fair, delicate form
gently presses the couch—and, like a dear, innocent, lovely creature, she is,
and she falls gently into sleep, with a sweet smile on her still sweeter face.
A man, of course, under the
same circumstances, acts quite differently.—Every moment in his chamber
indicates the coarse, rough mould of his sullen nature.—When all is ready, he
snuffs the candle out with his fingers, like a cannibal, and then jumps into
bed like a savage. For a few moments he
thinks of all the peccadilloes he may have committed during the day—vows a vow
to amend soon—groans, turns over, stretches himself, and then all is
silent save the heavy breathing of the slumberer.
1853
No wise young woman will
marry a man who treats either his mother or sister with disrespect or
neglect. No one man in a hundred of that
class will make even a decent husband. Poverty
is not a bar to marriage, but meanness or drunkenness or laziness, or the lack
of virtues first mentioned, is, which neither good looks nor money nor family
connections should be allowed to influence.
1884
Don’t snub a boy because he
wears shabby clothes. When Edison, the
inventor of the telephone, (sic) first entered Boston, he wore a pair of yellow
linen breeches in the depth of winter
Don’t snub a boy because his home is plain and
unpretending.
Abraham Lincoln’s early
home was a log cabin.
Don’t snub a boy because of a dullness in his
lessons. Hogarth, the
celebrated painter and
engraver, was a stupid boy at his books.
Don’t snub a boy because of the ignorance of his
parents. Shakespeare,
the world’s poet was the
son of a man who was unable to write
his own name.
Don’t snub a boy because he chooses a humble trade. The author
of Pilgrim’s Progress” was
a tinker.
Don’t snub a boy because of physical disabilities. Milton
was blind.
Don’t snub a boy because he stutters. Demosthenes, the great
orator of Greece, overcame
a harsh and stammering voice.
1887
The Kiss Perfected
Mrs. Langtry has invented a kiss that double discounts
anything of the kind ever attempted by Emma Abbot. In a memorable scene of one production, Mrs.
Langtry, playing the part of Lady Clancarty, finds her husband has escaped from
his pursuers through an open window into her room.
She stands with her back to the audience clear down the
stage, near the footlights. The husband
looks at her a moment and then rushes wildly into her arms. The both swing around and expose their
profiles to the audience. Then they hold
each other at arms length. Then her
bosom heaves and he pants. Then her head
falls upon his breast, reclining backward.
There is a crimson blush suffusing her charming face. Then he looks down at her, and she looks up
at him. Then there is a perceptible
pressure around the waist. Then he
suddenly places his lips to hers. Then
she clasps him around the head. Then
there is a soft, gurgling sound, as of water escaping from a kitchen sink. Then they are, as it were, glued
together. Then all is still.
Women in the audience become nervous. Bald-headed men are paralyzed. Men around town have their watches out timing
this. One second, two, three, four,
five, six, seven -- and then there is an explosion, as if the bung had blown
out of a beer barrel. It is all over.
That is the Langtry kiss.
1889
It is the custom of nearly every young girl to sit on the
floor while putting on her shoes. Indeed,
many women keep up the habit to middle-age, though full-fledged womanhood not
infrequently displays such embonpoint as would make such a course
difficult. Even in the case of a stout
woman, according to the statement of an English physician, sitting on the floor
is advisable as giving exercise such as those of portly dimensions are much in
need. The medical man asserts that a
position on the floor or ground is more natural than that occupied while using
a chair. “It was once general with the
human race,” says he, “and should therefore be very healthy. The exercise of getting up and down is
beneficial, as its very apt to produce strong back and thigh muscles. Turks, tailors and shoe-makers are examples
of this fact. If you sit on the floor
you can change your attitude as often as you please and can enjoy a variety of
poses, as no matter how you may alter it, there is never any danger of falling
off. The influx of visitors need never
cause anxiety to the well-constructed mind.
All you have to do is to provide comfortable cushions of every size and
shape and when a favored friend comes in, just roll off your own and present it
to them as the greatest possible compliment.
1899
Robert Louis
Stevenson wrote:
The world is so full of a number of
things
I’m sure we should all be as happy
as kings.
Although
he may have been mistaken in assuming that kings are happy,
no one will contest his view that the world is full of a number of
things.
And who
better than the newspapers of the day could bring that to the
attention of the masses?
CHAPTER 11
FOR YOUR INFORMATION
“What has become of the ‘blonde’? Well, I’ll tell you,” said a young lady the
other day. “You see it isn’t fashionable
any more. We used to think that golden hair
was beautiful and poetical, and all that, but there got to be so much of it,
and so much of it wasn’t golden, but straw color that all the beauty and poetry
has fled. It’s lot of trouble, too,
unless you are adept at the art of “blonding” the color will get on in streaks
so that anyone can see what is the matter with it. But the worst of all is when one desires to
quit the use of ‘blondine’ and let the natural color of the hair come back. It
can’t be done. It is very easy to color
the hair, but is a different thing to uncolor it. If you remember a few years ago when it was
all the rage, my hair was as yellow as anybody’s. Well, I’m getting it back to its old color
now, and you can rest assured I’ll never meddle with it again -- not if it is
1,000 times the fashions.”
“Is all the golden hair we see artificial?” was asked.
“There may be some that is natural, but very little. I don’t know of any myself. Why, even the natural blonds use regular
blondine material to make it brighter -- so they’re only “bleached” blondes
after all.”
This seemed to be the opinion of all the young ladies
questioned on the subject, and most of them spoke from experience.
They were nearly all recovering, or trying to recover
from what they frankly termed their folly, and spoke with undisguised contempt
of the “bleached blondes” as a class, although considerable pity was expressed
for individual victims of the “fad.” The
writer had the good fortune to attend an experience meeting, in which the
narrators had no hesitancy in speaking freely of the facts of the matter.
“I was yet a schoolgirl,” said the young lady, “when I
first began to use blondine. I learned
somehow or other that by mixing 10 cents worth of peroxide of hydrogen and a
nickel’s worth of ammonia I could obtain a preparation that would turn my hair
from the dark brown that it was to a lovely blonde. All the girls wanted to be blondes then, and
I decided to effect the transformation if possible. I bought the ingredients, made the necessary
preparation and applied it secretly. It
worked like a charm. After a few
applications I was an object of envy to every girl in school, and hundreds were
the prayers and entreaties I received from my friends to let them into the
secret. I presume I taught about 100 the
art, and I was looked upon by all as a sort of benefactor and received their
warmest thanks. The most of them have
found out what fools we all were, and I guess they are now ready to shower
anything but blessings on my head. Of
course, I didn’t know what the result was going to be, or I certainly
wouldn’t have suffered so much myself.
“I learned from experience,” said the young lady who
acted as teacher, ”and I gave the others points as they came to me. The first thing to do was to prepare the compound
of peroxide of hydrogen and ammonia. We
usually made this a finger-bowl. The
girl who was to be operated on took her seat in the straight-backed chair, so
placed that the light would fall on her hair properly. The hair was then carefully washed and combed
out straight and thoroughly dried. Much
of the success of the experiment depended on the preliminary steps. The next thing was to put on the ‘blondine.’ This should be done with a tooth brush. Some lazy people use a hair brush, but the
application can’t be made properly that way.
Others simply wash the head in a bowl of the mixture. This is the most slovenly way of all, and any
one can detect the sham when it is done that way. The color gets on in streaks and a sickly
greenish tinge is given that is perfectly hideous. The toothbrush, though, does not work
thoroughly. With it the hair is gone
over carefully, furrow by furrow, from the roots to the tip. This is the only way to do it
artistically It’s a little tedhous (Sic)
but then, you know, there is no use in doing it at all unless you’re going to
do it right. After the hair has been
once blondined, the work doesn’t end there by any means. The hair must be washed twice a week; it
should be done every morning. Blondined
hair gets dirty very easily, and nothing looks so ugly as when it gets into
that condition. The only way to prevent
this is to wash it, and, of course, when this is done so frequently the natural
oil of the hair becomes stiff and harsh, and it is very difficult to give it a
natural gloss.
“Another important thing to be observed is to get the
right shade. A girl who is naturally
inclined to be a blonde need only make one application, but six or seven are
required to change a good brown to blonde.
Then, too, as the hair grows, it must be constantly touched up at the
roots. If it isn’t, the appearance of a
dirty scalp is given. When a number of
applications have to be made, it is necessary to dry after each one. After a certain limit is reached it gradually
has no further effect.”
“But you know,” said the society lady, breaking in,
“peroxide of hydrogen and ammonia is not the best blondine by any means. The best blondine is champagne, and the best
of all the good times I ever had I think I have had the most fun at a champagne
blonding party. The blondine sold by
hair dealers and dyers is usually a champagne solution. It’s rather too expensive for most girls’ pin
money, and I have never attended more than two or three such parties. But they have lots of fun, I can tell
you. You see, you have to drink the
champagne that is left to keep it from spoiling -- just imagine!”
“If the peroxide of hydrogen and ammonia mixture is used,
and that is what most of us have to use who can’t afford the champagne,” said
one, “there is no doubt but what the brain will be affected in time. There is Miss ____________; nothing else
under the sun killed her but that. Of
course her family kept the cause secret as it could, but the physician knew
what was the matter with her well enough.
Her death was what scared me into stopping.”
After a person has once used blondine the only way to get
rid of it effectually is just to let the hair grow out and cut off the old,
dead stuff, and that requires a great deal of patience.
“Sage tea might have a little effect,” said the one who
had first spoken. “You know it’s quite
the thing now to have heavy, rich, gloss, dark brown hair, and almost as many
women use sage tea now as formerly used blondine. It was first used by persons with dirty brown
hair, but now others apply it, too. The tea is made tolerably strong and
applied as a wash without soap. It is
said to be good for the scalp. The hairs
get darker with each application but never “dead black.”
Another fashion is now much in vogue among servant girls,
it is said. By the use of beer straight
hair can be made as pretty and kinky as any head of hair you ever saw.
18--
A curious anomaly has just
come to light in Louisiana. The late constitutional
convention gave tax-paying women the right to vote upon all questions submitted
to taxpayers. It added a clause, unique
in the suffrage laws of the country, that any woman who did not wish to go to
the polls herself might give proxy to some one else to cast her vote for
her. This was done out of chivalrous
regard for the women, who, it was thought, might shrink from contact with the
polls. New Orleans is preparing to hold
its first election under the new law, to decide upon a tax levy for sewerage
and drainage. An examination of the
assessors’ books reveals that there are more than 10,000 tax-paying women in
New Orleans, and the mayor, the city council, the president of the city board
of health and other civic dignitaries have been eloquently urging women to vote
in favor of better sanitation for their homes.
Some of the women thought they would rather vote by proxy; and this has
brought to light the anomaly in question.
If a woman gives a certificate to a proxy to vote for her the certificate
must be signed by two competent witnesses.
Many New Orleans women are now finding out for the first time that by
Louisiana law, which is based on the old law of France, a woman is not a
competent witness to a legal document.
In Louisiana tax-paying women may vote on the expenditure of their
taxes, and in this way are in advance of all the northern and eastern
states. But while a woman may be a voter
as proxy for another woman she is not legally competent to witness the signing
of the certificate.
1899
Let us preserve every influence which tends to enable and
enrich life, and increase rather than diminish their force. Let us encourage the education of our sex
along womanly lines, and give to our race and the world the benefit of the bright
and active minds, as well as the tender and sympathetic hearts, with which God
has endowed the better half of his creation.
JULIA E. MUNRO
1898
A Souther
IT’S A MAN’S WORLD
On the preceding pages we
have attempted to reveal to the unaware just what life is like for the average
girl; especially for the unmarried girl.
Our remarks may seem unkind, harsh, and biased, but we feel one’s eyes
must be open to reality before putting one’s entire future into the hands of
another.
Whoever it was that said love
is blind, spoke an eternal truth. The
young, inexperienced girl sees in marriage what she wants to see and tends to
ignore all the unpleasant evidence which tends to paint a different
picture. The reader must keep in mind
that this is still a man’s world.
Granted, the man of the house is invariably bequeathed the position of
the wage-earner which means he has the full responsibility to be the sole
financial provider for the family. All
too often, we have attempted to point out, “the head of the family”, “the man
of the house” interprets his responsibilities as license to make unreasonable
demands on his family. It too often
brings about marital disharmony and changes the eager, expectant bride into a
disillusioned, bitter person.
Despite what some would-be
philosophers may contend, ultimately the distaff side of the marriage team has an
arsenal of weapons at her command which, if used with love, can steer the
relationship on the right, the pleasant course.
The reader is invited to sift
and winnow the suggestions here presented, and employ those which are apropos
to her life, always bearing in mind that reality is rarely as idyllic as
young hopes and dreams would have us
conclude.
In spite of all our progress,
it is still a man’s world.
HUSBAND -- THE DOMESTIC
TYRANT
Picture to yourself a man of family. He provides a home for them, he sends the
children to school; perhaps—perhaps—he makes his wife an allowance, though this
he does not consider incumbent.
All these things he accounts unto himself for
righteousness and on his balance sheet he jots them down in a large clear hand
to his credit. This done, he closes the
book of self-esteem and opens the tome of the law of man. Now these laws are few and brief, but very
much to the point, and he lives by them to the letter. The first say: “In thine own house thou art IT, and no one shall gainsay thee in any way or for any reason; and
the second and the third, even unto the fifth law, are like unto the
first”. When the man closes his book he
is read for anything.
He may make himself as absolutely disagreeable as he
pleases, and because he has provided food and raiment, and because he is the
Whole Thing, nobody may gainsay him.
He may find fault with the housekeeping and the
housekeeper, he may rail at the expense of running such an establishment, he
may storm at the bills, at the cost of schooling, at the number of eggs
consumed daily; he may make meal times
so uncomfortable that his children are crippled with indigestion for want of
the good sauce of laughter and banter with their food, and yet, because he is
the father of the family and head of the house,
his ill temper must be borne in silence and with the utmost patience.
The domestic tyrant is the Grand Mogul and the Great Panjandrum
in one. There is no appeal from his
dictates. He lays down the law and
exacts obedience. He is the autocrat of
the breakfast, dinner and supper table, and it doesn’t make the fillip of a
finger’s difference to him that his wife’s aunt or his daughter’s suitor are
guests at his festive board a long as he
has the floor and can listen to the
tempestuous sound of his own voice, laying down the law.
It is impossible to argue with him since he is always in the
right. If the smallest contrary opinion
lifts its timid voice he is ready to exclaim, like the Queen in Alice, “Off
with its head!”
His pathway is strewn with heartaches and wounded feelings and
sprinkled with briny tears of the feminine portion of his family, who are so
unceremoniously thrust out of his consideration.
He doesn’t drink, he doesn’t gamble, perhaps he doesn’t even
smoke.
He boasts that he has none of the small vices, yet he will ruthlessly and brusquely correct
his wife before her table guest, and wither her with sarcasm; while his
children learn to dread the sound of his footfall, and sigh with relief when
the door shuts behind him.
This is not the picture of one man, but a composite photograph
of many men who have the reputation of being good husbands and fathers, and
whose absolute cruelty is only known to those of their immediate households.
--Caroline Ryland in Richmond News Leader, WR
